How to Feel Good About Turning Down BAD Job Offers

Throughout my 25+ year career, I have received numerous job offers.  I have accepted some and rejected others; the reasons for my rejections have varied.  I have also had “buyer’s remorse” ‘about jobs I have turned down, wondering if I made the right choice.  In one case, I turned down a very appealing offer from a Big 5 consulting firm to go to work for a start-up, from which I was escorted off the premises (along with the executive team) just four short months later.  Needless to say, I continued to kick myself about the offer I had turned down.  However, that firm also laid off thousands in the same time period because of the dot.com implosion.  The sad truth is that we don’t always have hindsight as we enter into the decision-making process and it’s critical to know yourself and to read the tea leaves (aka, red flags) about companies that offer you jobs.  This way, you should never feel bad about the offers you turn down.  Here are some stories about some of my experiences that you may relate to.  

I have been laid off more than once.  In one situation, I was actually “invited” to join another group within the company in lieu of layoff.  I accepted the opportunity to avoid unemployment. That decision resulted in a very toxic work environment for me.  I was treated disrespectfully, my experience and expertise were not valued, colleagues I respected were equally maligned and the work I was “assigned,” was far below my capabilities and experience, and my morale and mental health suffered.  In hindsight, when I was offered the position, I had reservations.  Knowing some of the players, I was skeptical. I instinctively knew on my second day in the group that it wasn’t going to be a good fit.   I stuck it out for one year and, by the time I chose to leave, the small department had already turned over 50%.   I ultimately accepted a job at another company at considerably lower compensation and benefits just to extricate myself from the toxicity.  If I had to do it over again, I would have politely declined the opportunity.  I should have trusted my instincts at the outset.  As I described already, in another scenario, I was escorted off the premises from a start-up company, along with members of the executive team, with no warning, no severance, and amid the dot.com implosion in 2000.  However, I managed to pick up enough consulting and writing work to pay my mortgage and survive during the year it took me to find another full-time job.  I accepted the first offer I got, from a reputable company.  The job paid 25% less than the one from which I was laid off, and it took me almost four years to get back to the same income I had previously. For the most part, I was uninspired by my colleagues and, while I managed to have some fun leading process redesign efforts initially, the work eventually became uninspiring.  If I had done more homework leading up to accepting the job (i.e., if I had focused more on interviewing them than the converse), I may not have accepted the job.  However, I was eager for a steady paycheck, healthcare benefits, and paid time off.  I learned later that a high percentage of the company’s employees went to work there just for the benefits.  That was very telling.  

I was laid off from the same company on two different instances.  In both situations, I was provided with severance and afforded the opportunity to apply for other positions within the company. The first time, I applied for a position that appealed to me, but also worked my network outside the organization and it resulted in two simultaneous job offers.   It was a “Devil you know vs. the Devil you don’t know” decision.  I felt there was more security (and a better salary and benefits) at the company where I had been working.  I declined the external offer, and I felt bad about it. A position had actually been created for me and there was confidence and trust in my abilities. In hindsight, I would have had aggressive sales and performance targets to meet, and would likely have been required to travel excessively, not to mention a nasty rush hour commute, spending a couple hours a day in the car.  In subsequent years, others have come and gone from that company, so I am confident I made the right choice.  However, it could have proven to be exciting and challenging, while the position I accepted ended up resulting in another layoff two and a half years later.  In short, we can never second guess what might have happened if we had made different choices.  What we can do, though, is make the best choice every time. 

When thinking about whether to accept a job, it’s imperative to do our homework.  Read Glassdoor, Salary.com and AARP reviews of companies.  Visit company websites, read mission statements, and look at photos of leadership teams to see the types of individuals who are valued for leadership roles.   Be sure to network with current employees to learn about the companies.  Finally, if you are lucky enough to interview with several different people, take the time to ask them what they like best about the company.  Find out how long they have worked there and observe what they say as well as what they don’t say.  I actually interviewed with a company where more than one of the interviewers indicated that the group had been in “chaos,” through “multiple reorganizations,” that people were overextended and service delivery was poor.  In short, I was given multiple warnings.  Ironically, the numerous reorganizations resulted in the position for which I was interviewing being pulled.  By the time that happened, it had become clear that I would have been stepping into a land mine.  That would have been a job offer to decline.

If the writing is on the wall before you’ve gone to work for a company, if online reviews are poor or if employees don’t speak favorably about the company, it’s probably not a place where you should work.  If the job description is fuzzy, or if your interviewers can’t articulate expectations of you, you probably need to pass.  Finally, if you receive an offer at a much lower salary than what you consider to be the market rate or much less than you are comfortable earning, consider a pass.  We spend anywhere from 40-80 hours a week working (hopefully closer to 40).  We may spend more time working than sleeping.  A bad job can destroy our quality of life.  If a job offer is bad for whatever the reason - salary and benefits, workload and expectations, or even a company that isn’t aligned with your values, then turn it down.  Never feel bad about turning down the wrong job.  A better opportunity is around the corner.